I have struggled with an eating disorder in the past a couple times without anyone knowing. I now have relapsed and lost 18 pounds in a 1.5 months. I know i need to get help but I feel like i’m not thin enough still. It’s tiring feeling like i’m never going to be enough. Sometimes i think nothing is even wrong with what i’m doing because i get compliments from me left and right telling me how much better I look after loosing the weight I did. My mom was even proud of me for loosing weight. My friends once heard my purge and asked me why I do it and I told them “I don’t think my mom will be happy with me or proud of me unless i’m skinny”.
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You can never expect someone to be happy for you or to not be proud of you for anything. As long as you are ok and are doing whatever you can to be in a better situation, just know there are always people to help without judgement.