i’ve felt so insecure for so long and i just want to love myself. i don’t know what it’s like and the voice in the back of my head tells me that i’ll never know what it’s like. last summer i got really knowledgeable about eating disorders and for some sick and twisted reason i decided that my goal was to have an eating disorder. i started skipping meals and counting calories and that turned into not eating at all in a day. now it’s been a year since i’ve been doing this and i can’t stop. i don’t know what it’s like to eat breakfast and not feel guilty about it. or what it’s like to eat past 12am and not feel guilty. i just want to feel pretty and skinny in my own skin. i’m so lost. i won’t even let my own family see me in a tight shirt or tight shorts. i always wear baggy pants & baggy shirts. i really need help but i don’t know how to ask.