Uhh so I’ve literally never spoken a word of this out loud but I think my dad might be gay/bi/pan or something and is cheating on my mom. I myself am a pan girl but the more I think about the possibility of him not being devoted the more I feel like I may have some internalized phobias. Basically a few years ago I was in the App Store and we had connected accounts and I saw that he had Tindr, Bumble, Grindr and some HU apps as well as a map of London gay bars bc he had gone to London for a business trip. He really does seem like he loves my mom and I believe he does and wants to be with her ultimately but maybe he’s just confused? He comes from an extremely religious and traditional Mexican Catholic family so maybe he’s just in turmoil or some shit. Sometimes I think “what if my mom knows” and I’m torturing myself but idk. I have too much anxiety about this to talk to him ever because it could ruin my life. Because of corona he hasn’t left the house in months tbh so he can’t really do anything but before quarantine I definitely think some of these things were happening. Also he def smokes weed bc I saw he has 2 medical marijuana locator apps and found a receipt under his car chair and it makes me feel like shit even tho I haven’t thought abt it much lately.