Hi. I’m Laila. I’m in highschool. I recently finished my freshman year, and it was the worst of my life. All throughout middle school, I was bullied. I was told horrible comments, and made fun of behind my back. It sucked. I thought in high school, I would be a new me. But I wasn’t. I was holding myself back. People rarely bullied me. They would say some things behind my back, but I wasn’t bullied. I continued to think they would. I would try to fit in all the time, but I wouldn’t. I was a mess. A few months into the school year, I found out that I had fallen in love with my best friend. I didn’t know what to do, or who to tell. I would cry every night. I would go to school miserable. Quarantine started, and it got worse. I would continue to cry ever night, and I didn’t have anyone to talk to. I told a few people over time, and I eventually told my best friend I loved her. It was super hard and for a week after I told her, I was in a horrible mental state. I was so scared that she wouldn’t want to be my friend. Eventually, and now, we are better and closer. But lately, I’ve started to feel horrible about how I look, about how annoying I am. I feel like I’m the second choice all the time. I feel like no one actually likes me. I’m insecure. I’ve been having so many panic attacks at night. It’s a mess.
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