um hi lmao ive been meaning to talk about this for awhile but ive forced myself to think my friends dont care about me and i dont wanna hurt them so ive pushed my problems to the side to make them happy. i hate myself so much. i feel so worthless but ive been forcing myself to act okay so i wont hurt anyone. i wanna feel okay again but i feel like i dont deserve it. i dont know how to talk to my family about this either they are already going through enough stress and i dont wanna hurt them plus,, we dont really have a close relationship that normal families do. corona has really been destroying my mental health. i hate my body image so much everyone at my school is so judge mental ive forced myself not to eat some days but in the end i always eat and i feel so guilty after. i just wanna be happy with myself. ive been crying almost everyday and im on the verge of tears while writing this. i dont think i deserve to be happy.
if anybody sees this thank you for listening to my vent ig haha but if you see this please drink water today <3 thank you for reading