honestly i don’t know if anyone is going to read this or anything but anyways. i feel really empty and lost. everything that i used to find entertaining and fun i’ve lost interest in i don’t feel like hanging out with friends because it doesn’t give me joy like it used to honestly i have no effort. i have no motivation to get out of the bed for school or dressed every day. there’s something missing in me? i’m confused about a lot of things and don’t care about everything i used to. i try to explain this to my friends as they’re open with how they’re feeling and i’m the “funny one” who always cheers them up and gives me advice. recently i tried opening up to them about my feelings and start a conversation about my mental health but they shut me down i don’t know if it was intentional but they completely changed the subject back to themselves or just didn’t respond. ive tried one more time since then to open up but they ignored me again so by this point i give up trying. i have bad thoughts sometimes and i try to distract myself from it. i started meditating a couple weeks ago and i suppose it helped put some pieces together? but i haven’t done that in a few days and i’m scared i’m losing motivation to do that as well. something feels missing from my life shits messed up and i have no one to speak to, i don’t want to bring it up to my parents because i feel guilty as i’ve always been the perfect child i suppose and i don’t want them to worry even though i know that’s wrong of me. anyway i don’t know if anyone will read this or how this site works but just needed to get it off my chest. sorry if anything is spelt wrong or not correct i have problems with confusing the letters and words sometimes. :) peace and love