I feel that since I was about six my life was marked by a trail of dead bodies of dearly beloved pets, when I was about nine I started to get bullied, and around the same time I was getting groomed by a pedo, around when I was eleven I started self harming but got clean. Last year I got into an incredibly toxic relationship where my not being able to say no and not being able to speak up was taken advantage of and once the relationship was ended he exposed info to embrass me and with this year my family has been having worse financial issues that even before, the trail of dead bodies is still following me, I've been too scared to ask for therapy and I've started self harming again without anyone noticing and making me wonder if anyone would care if I offed myself