i feel as if i’m the one that’s always there for others but never has anyone for herself, to complain to, to cry to. i m so tired of faking it for the sake for others, to have to always cheer up everyone while being at my lowest. i feel so out of place, like im always in the back. however, i am not blaming my friends as it’s not their fault, they try and make me feel better, they take care of me, but no matter what they do, i just don’t fit in. i don’t fit in ANYWHERE and sometimes i think if i were purposely not meant to fit in, like this world wasn’t meant for me. everything feels so out of place, and surreal. i m too much of a work and no one understands how burdened i feel by being here. carrying on w life just feels like a chore or a hobby that i am slowly losing interest in. i want to disappear quietly.