Nearly six months ago, my cousin died in a car accident at only 18. I was shocked to say the least, it was so completely unexpected. I had trouble wrapping my mind around the fact that someone only two years older than me could be gone in an instant. I struggled explaining how I felt since I wasn’t very close with him. I hadn’t seen him in years and I never anticipated the way I’d be seeing him again was at his own funeral. Months after his passing, I silently struggled worrying every day if something like that were to happen to me and not understanding how something so terrible could happen to such a young person who had his whole life ahead of him. I quit driving for about two months and thought about him and what happened every single day. I remember decorating for Christmas with him and my other cousins, seeing him at his grandmother’s, seeing him swimming at the community pool, and so many other small moments that I now think about daily. Six months later, I passed my drivers test and now drive almost every day. Every single time I step into my car though, I think about him and what happened and worry about that happening to me or my brother and our parents suffering because of that. The night before my drivers exam, I had an anxiety attack thinking about what happened to him and stayed up the entire night worrying and lost in my mind. My Grandma recently bought me a guardian angel clip for the car that’s placed above my head on the sun visor. It’s embarrassing but before I start the car I say a quick pray to the small metal angel praying that I get to my destination safe. It’s weird knowing someone you knew for so long is gone at such a young age and even weirder knowing you didn’t see them for years before his passing. I just pray he’s safe and looking down on his parents as their guardian angel.