I made a post about this a little over a year ago but deleted it not long after. I don't remember why exactly, but I wanted to share my story again. When I was between the ages of 5 and 7 I woke up with my brother's hand down my pants. Me, him, and my sister were all sleeping in my parents bedroom. They weren't around at the time and I'm not sure why. I remember feeling confused and uncomfortable, removing his hand from my body as quietly as I could without waking him up. It felt cold and unwelcomed. I remember exactly what shorts I was wearing, and when I got them. Around the time this took place I remember my brother inviting me and my sister to spend the night in his room. I don't remember everything from these instances, and to be honest it's a little bit difficult for me. I'm afraid that I might be forgetting things, or even misremembering them. What I do remember is him kissing me, and maybe my sister, in ways that loved ones have never kissed me before. I remember him flipping me over into a cuddling like position and doing to me what I can only describe as making out while my sister watched the tv in front of us. After this event, or so I believe, is when the incident i mentioned previously took place. I wonder if what he did was worse than I remember. If maybe I'm blocking things out because I can't handle them. I pushed these events aside for a while until last year when I almost shared them with a friend. To this day I still haven't told anyone. I'm almost 16 now and I still live with my family and brother. I love him so much and I'm afraid that if I tell someone he'll get in trouble. To be honest I don't think he'd even remember what he did or why he did it. I don't know if it was on purpose or not, or what his motives were. Still I'm disgusted by everything that happened. I've been thinking about it recently more than I'd like. My friend has been talking lately about how she finds my brother attractive. It makes me angry sometimes because she has no idea what happened. I might tell her eventually but I'm not sure if it's a good idea.
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