i didn't know this would be so long but PLEASE read it i never wanted to cause drama i need help idk what to do. i feel lonely.
hi uh so basically i have this "friend" that I've known since the 7th grade (im a freshman now). i feel like she's always used me for homework and stuff. like in seventh grade she asked me for a pencil and i gave it to her but she never gave it back and when i asked her where it was she said she already did. it seems kinda stupid but thats just the starting. then she'd always ask me for my hw, and i was nice and i gave it to her and she would copy it or she would show it to teacher, but sometimes she wouldn't give it back to me and i'd get points taken off. she'd apoligized but it seemed forced. there were many times where i tried to say no when she asked for my hw but she'd basically BEG me so i felt bad and i gave it to her. and when i asked her a few times for hw (she asked me almost everyday) she'd either say she didn't do it yet or she'd send me a pic of her hw which seemed like she barely put any effort in it. She was part of this friend group I'd joined since i didn't have any friends and so i didn't feel like i could say anything in fear of being kicked out (they had all known each other since elementary school and i'd only joined in 7th grade. i always felt left out though.) Also, she had these "popular" friends and whenever she was around them she'd act like i didn't exist, or she'd treat me like trash. so one day in eigth grade i got tired of her and i told someone i barely knew how toxic she was and how i felt used and i didn't like her. well fast forwarding to now, she somehow found out about that and she confronted me through text. well i went off on her and literally dumped all of my feelings and anger and basically i told her i was done w her and we both unfollowed each other on all social media platforms. but now her friend group (the one ive been trying to join for two years but it doesn't seem like they like me though they are literally my only 'friends' or id be sitting alone at lunch), found out and i feel like they all dislike me. a few of them unfollowed me and the ones that were nice to me still follow me but are ignoring me and i feel like they don't like me. well now i basically have no friends. and so one of the people from that group told me i should apologize to the toxic friend and i dont rlly know if i should because she's been taking advantage of me and so i shouldnt have to apologize. like i was rude to her i guess but she's been like that to me for two years and i even apologized while i texted her saying "im sorry if i hurt u but im done" and she didn't even say anything even though she said a lot of hurtful things too. i don't want her to play the victim bc somehow she always makes it seem like im to blame and like i dont want people to take advantage of me like that.
HERE'S THE QUESTION:
idk if she really is toxic or if it's just me. so i need help like should i apologize to her or just leave it alone. cuz im afraid if i leave it alone that whenever we go back to school in person ill have no friends and no where to sit.
she is definitely really toxic, a real friend wouldn’t just use someone and be friends with them just because they get something in return (in this case she gets hw from you basically everyday) i’ve gotten to know a lot of toxic people like that and trust me, they like to play victim and make others feel bad, i know you’re scared you won’t have any friends when you go back to school but it’s better for you if you just left the situation alone because having toxic people like that in your life makes everything worse, she really doesn’t deserve an apology, also you’re a freshmen so you’ll definitely find new friends, i know it’s easier said than done but before ninth grade started i dumped all my friends because they were toxic and i was alone for a while but at least i didn’t need to worry about drama and a ton of useless things and then i met my real group of friends, finding good friends can take a while but it’s definitely worth it, some people in our lives are just meant to teach us a lesson in life and some are meant to stay by our side and that’s just how it works, i really hope you’re able to drop her and make new friends